I’m driving back from the local auto-parts store with some new bottles of oil and a new Fan Clutch when I see the all-to-familiar sight in front of me. As I stop for a red light, I notice a red Chevy pickup making a right-hand turn onto my street in front of me followed by a lowered red Honda Civic. Now, I don’t know what triggered the moment prior to my arrival, but the Chevy took that turn extremely slow, nearly coming to a stop. The Civic driver, apparently already enraged, nearly rear-ends the Chevy, then swerves out of control at full throttle with that nasty POS Civic “Oh look at me, I’m Cool” sound into the oncoming left turn lane in a cheap effort to pass the Chevy. They both drive side by side slowly for several feet, then stop while the Civic driver tries yelling at the Chevy driver. Since cars were approaching from behind them, they started to drive away.
By the time I caught up to them, the Civic driver had apparently cut in front of the Chevy in the right-lane, stopped, got out of his car, and proceeded to walk against traffic up to the drivers window yelling at him like a typical ignorant driver in his “moment” of tunnel vision and lack of logical thought process. The old people in front of me, not knowing what to do, had driven into the center lane letting me pass in the now-only free lane while we get to watch the angry driver unfold on the poor Chevy driver.
Two stop-lights ahead, while I’m sitting a few cars back awaiting a green left turn arrow, I notice the Civic driver is now two cars back from me. Oh, this will be fun. As I proceed through the intersection into the left-most lane while the car behind me pulls immediately into the right-hand lane to turn into the gas station, it is just me and the Civic. The Civic had planned on speeding around car turning into the gas station and weaving around me. Since I wanted to have some fun and screw with him, I slow way down in front of him. He proceeds to steer his clunked up excuse for a sports car out of the path of hitting me at the same time I slam on the gas to prevent him from rear-ending me. From my rear view mirrors I see his car nearly perpendicular to the curb since he doesn’t know how to properly control his vehicle with tires screeching, then I hear him hit his precious already-scratched-and-dented body kit against the curb, likely throwing his front wheels out of alignment, too. By now I’m already stopped for traffic in front of me, and he just whips into the nearest parking lot, jumps out of his car waiving his hands in the air looking at his poor bumper and fender. He then looks at my car with a look of “WTF” like I’ve never seen before, apparently baffled by what his own rage has accomplished.
Since he’s pulled into a parking lot, and would have to run across the street to get to me, I proceed home, making sure he’s nowhere in sight to follow me, smiling the whole way knowing he got what he deserved.
Nissan: +1
Honda: -1
The look of a young, ignorant wanna-be ricer who thinks he’s the best despite being defeated by his inability to control his anger (and car): Priceless
Dude!!! Awesome. There is something about your area that provokes all of the idiots. Remember when we were going back to your house from fry’s and that guy cut in front of us and then jumped out of his car waving his arms.
Yep… I certainly remember that. All the more reason to get dash-cams installed. As I think about it, I don’t think this Civic guy even knew what happened! Even though I stopped fairly abruptly infront of him, he probably didn’t think anything of it since by the time he looked over at me, I was already stopped for cars in front of me anyway. Ahh, the stealthy Nissan!